Why You Feel “Stuck” in Fight or Flight and How to Reset Your Nervous System

Evolution Counselling
Nov 5
3 min read

At Evolution Counselling, many clients report feeling “stuck” in a heightened state of stress, as though their body and mind can’t fully relax, even when life is calm. They might try breathing exercises, mindfulness, or self-care routines and still feel on edge or disconnected.

This experience often relates to how the nervous system reacts to ongoing stress or past challenging experiences. In this article, we will examine why the nervous system sometimes becomes stuck in fight or flight mode and how trauma-informed counselling can assist you in feeling more balanced, safe, and connected again.

The Survival System: Fight, Flight, Freeze and the Risk of Getting Stuck

Humans possess an inborn survival system, often referred to as the “fight or flight” response (sometimes extended to include “freeze” or “fawn”). When the brain perceives threat, it triggers a cascade of responses: adrenaline release, increased heart rate, muscle tension, narrowed attention, and a surge of energy to respond to danger.

Normally, once the threat passes, the body should naturally return to calm. But if someone has experienced prolonged stress, difficult life events, or overwhelming situations, the nervous system can stay “on guard,” making it hard to relax even in safe environments.

This is sometimes described as being stuck in survival mode, where the body reacts as if danger is always present, even when we know we are safe.

Signs You May Be Stuck in Fight or Flight

Some common signs include:

Feeling on edge, anxious, or restless much of the time
Being easily startled by noises or sudden changes
Having trouble sleeping or feeling unrefreshed even after rest
Feeling emotionally reactive or overwhelmed by small stressors
Sometimes swinging the other way into numbness, fatigue, or emotional shutdown
Feeling “frozen” or unable to act despite wanting to
Avoiding emotions, sensations, or memories because they feel too overwhelming

This pattern is often linked to what therapists call nervous system dysregulation, where the body struggles to return to balance after stress.

Why Your Nervous System Doesn’t Easily Reset

If you have tried calming strategies and still feel on edge, it does not mean you are doing something wrong. Often, it points to the nervous system needing more support to find safety and calm.

Some reasons why the system may stay stuck include:

1. Chronic or repeated stress

When stress piles up over time without enough recovery, the nervous system can get conditioned to stay in “alert mode.”

2. Disconnection from body signals

Sometimes people become disconnected from physical sensations because paying attention to them feels uncomfortable. Learning to notice these signals gently is often part of the healing process.

3. Coping strategies that worked before but now limit you

Strategies like avoiding emotions or pushing feelings aside can help us get through tough times, but later they can make it harder to relax or process experiences.

4. Limited tools for calming the system

Not everyone grows up learning ways to help the nervous system settle. Simple grounding or breathing practices can be powerful, but they often need to be introduced gradually and with support.

How Trauma-Informed Counselling Helps

At Evolution Counselling, our approach is trauma-informed, which means we focus on safety, choice, and collaboration while introducing tools that help your body and mind find balance. Trauma-informed care recognizes how stress and adversity impact people and provides support that avoids re-traumatization and builds trust at every step.

Here is what you can expect when working with us:

Safety First
We start by understanding your unique experiences, stress patterns, and needs. The pace is always collaborative and respectful of your comfort level.
Practical Regulation Skills
You will learn simple, accessible techniques to help calm your nervous system and build a greater sense of stability over time.
Emotional Support at Your Pace
When you are ready, we explore emotions and experiences in a way that feels safe and supported, without rushing the process.
Strengthening Resilience
Our goal is to help you feel more grounded, connected, and able to respond to life’s challenges with flexibility and confidence.

Getting in Touch with Evolution Counselling

If you recognize yourself in what you have read and want support in calming and rebalancing your nervous system, we invite you to reach out to Evolution Counselling.

We provide trauma-informed care designed to help you feel safer in your own body, navigate stress more effectively, and build tools for long-term well-being.